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Square One

May 9, 2010

Well, here I am!!  back.  Again!!

Fighting, Keeping a straight face. Acting like it doesn’t get to you, Doesn’t hurt you. It never is easy!

Things are relative!  people perceive things the way they want it to be, or the way they don’t.

the number of variations in the human mind are infinite.! any situation can be perceived as anything else!! ( apologies for the vague comparison)

There are so many different worlds! and in them reside so many different souls….

I am one such soul… What i find is never going to be the end of it! Its always the beginning of!

The line beginning of the end, signifies re birth.
Clarity! Clarity of vision, purpose, path, want. there is this trick to clarity. The more you try to make things Clear and vision the future, or construct your purpose or lay down your path or define your wants. The more difficult it becomes to do all of those just be cause of the fact you need answers to all those questions that pop up due to your action of Clarifying things!

Read that again!

Clarity! Clarity of vision, purpose, path, want. there is this trick to clarity. The more you try to make things Clear and vision the future, or construct your purpose or lay down your path or define your wants. The more difficult it becomes to do all of those just be cause of the fact you need answers to all those questions that pop up due to your action of Clarifying things!

thus clarity is a illusion!?
What is an Illusion!?  Any form of camouflage that is used to deceive anyone from the Truth!

Thus what is been hidden from us? The fact we are not in control?!

This is a very run down path. i.e. if we are not in control who is.. and how do you define control? what is choice? Do we really have a choice or is it all made up and we are just playing out a script!?

choice is a simple enough example! Lets assume i’m here writing this article. If you know me or even remotely seen me sometime. you do know i do NOT function with out music. So no surprises here i’m as a matter of fact listening to something, now i have decided i want to change the song. Now the question is have i total freedom to choose what i like or has it been already been fabricated and I will end up doing it. Now the choice been made the effects do not end there. The implications run deeper. Sticking to the same example. I find the genre of song will change the outcome of this article. Thus in order to give the right ending to this piece I shud’ve listened to the right song.  But how does one knw which is the right song????? thus confusion sets in! and i pick some random song. But was this all already planned and set up so that i wud leave the song to a random algorithm which plays one song from over 10000?? now WHAT CHOICE DID I MAKE? was it all made up!? all that gave me was a headache! damn!!!

Why the doomsday image being painted?! well cuz, life sucks! Its all just a pre fabricated. Its all made up! You are going down, no matter wat you do! U will be down and out even before you realise wat is goin on! Its hard. It loves to play hard ball. and It won’t take any prisoners! IT WILL NOT HOLD BACK!

Now you knw what is life! You will do either of two things!

Either you lie down and take it! or you dish some back at it.

It ain’t gonna be a cake walk! It rubs ur face on the curb u take that and fuel ur self.!

Hold it in. Hold it till you can build yourself a steady thought process. a fire. an absolute beast.  Unleash it! let that baby rip!! all you need is one moment!

One moment is all one needs to make that difference! One moment of weakness can be your downfall…

equally one moment of resilience, one moment of  unadulterated innocence , one moment of  pure spite, pure anger.

Any thing an be your fuel. Bottom line is to keep that fire burning.! Keep that up! and you got your self an insatiable desire to grab life by its nuts and put it to the curb every single time!!!!

To get what you want outta life, you gotta take this plunge.There are two ways this one ends.

Either get washed ashore a wet sock! or u ride that baby like there is no tomorrow!

So, Stepping into this big bad world, I hope i fall, i hope i get beaten up, thrown to the curb, hell even get mugged if its gonna help. Cuz once that fire burns… Its gonna bring the house down!!!!!

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Pebbles!

May 1, 2010

How u been?? she en-quired as I walked in,I gently nodded.

Its been sometime since I’ve been here. The place reminds me of a lot of old memories.

These memories are doors which open up to many more.. as they lead to the reasons behind those memories.

The lost causes, the failed experiments, unfruitful expeditions. I ponder upon those.  Those doors, always makes me think!

Time to think may never be up, but the reason quite possibly can!

But just today an old friend of mine sent me a thought to dwell upon,

” Brave are those, who make decisions despite their fear! Who are tormented by the devil every step of the way and gripped by anxiety about their every action, wondering if they are right or wrong.”

Lets drop the devil for now. the rest being relevant here.!

Seems like i’ve become somewhat of a veteran here. The place feels like home. Coming back to this now, doesn’t feel like it used to. Theses times are different.

Its been a long time coming. Is it this thought that pushes me or just plain stupidity.!  Off we go, off the cliff.

Is it gonna get me back here. i do not know. But the next time i will have  a different take on things.

Thats what experiences are all about. You start with an opinion and end up with a changed one! Most of the times.

Here I am. Breath in the air. The sea, she taunts me.

With her immense latent power. Lies there.

Teasing and Testing. Humbling me at every step.

Teaching as I move over her. Gently.

Shes’ churning, rocking my boat. Bow to Stern.

Her mellow waves unsettle me.

The calm she brings with her has an eery silence overpowering me.

And bringing me to this point in time!!!!

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To NEVER Tame the Beast…

February 15, 2010

I see the light,

but i’m forced to stay in the dark.

The more i churn,  more i fall,

but as i fall the stronger I grow!

I fear them, their laughs grow shriller,

but do they know i wait here.

I wait, knowing only one thing.

They will fear me one day!

I am the one, lurking in the crowd,

I am the one  u don’t see.

The one u don’t hear,

’cause the day u hear me,

you shall not hear anyone anymore.

Only I hold the key,

Only I know how,

Only I shall do,

Only I shall be.

The rage that tears now,

The rage shall also put to peace.

The pain that spears through now,

The pain shall also heal.

The darkness falls over as a velvet  blanket,

To wrap me in its never ending coils,

But does it know, I hide.

A light, to rip apart the layers.

I am me, I am here,

I am the sea and the fire

I am now and I am never.

I am only forever.

I know u feel the same,

For all have felt before,

And all shall feel after.

For those who haven’t  felt, you no longer live!

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Spirituality !!

January 14, 2010

No no no i’m not talking about wat GOD is and that stuff.

I’m here to tell u one thing.!

It is there. believe it. do it. live it.

and most important is Think it!!

go out live ur dream!! and hope one day u never wake up from one!  have a good one ! :)

- to the one who will always rule the roost!

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I’d take a mashed mind and gravy!!

December 4, 2009

WARNING : THE FOLLOWING PASSAGE MAKES NO

SENSE!!!

EVEN TO ME!!

so jus take a hike!!

still here? scooooot!!

There seems to be this crazed nut running around town!!! Who goes around screwing up everything he does!!!

He does everything not the way it shud be done! He takes a million advices and still follows none though he wants to follow them all!!

He’s plugged into this system! he needs some gratification! some substance from the world! some out put !!

He lies here tired and restless! wondering if der can be something like the

perpetual machine ever!!

Give him some thing frm nothin!! Its this state of just utter standstill as he looks at the world go by.

It gives him hope! but then hope itself is a manifestation of our consciousness… Its a last resort!

He tries to shout out! but the world is so obsessed  with the I pod that no one can hear him!

He sits back and reflects how he was the part of the world and now is looking at it jus rush past him!!

Finding solace that he must be on his way!! departing frm the oasis he was at.. the beautiful waters, the shade of the palm trees!

all must be left behind!!

Shout out man!! i say to him.. I cant hear u!!

He mumbles to himself , thats wat they all say!!

He was visited by this dream! some being in that hinted that he’d rather take the freakin risk of takin life by its collar

than hopin it comes to u..

He did not see the point! but he felt it was the thing to be done!

He feels its not the right place to hop on! there aint a RIGHT place! jus hop on!

jus get somethin goin! nt when the world doesnt seem to wanna do its part!!

He’d have lost himself somewhere but keeps bumping into ppl a lot!! are tryin to get lost!!

At the end he does get on the World Express jus hopefully didnt loose a limb or two!!

Then GOD appears! tellin him it was all a test!!

COME ON GIMME A BREAK!! TEST!!!! R U KIDDING ME!!!!!!!!

The whole point of the exercise  was to get u to see the inner… OH PLEASE!! SAVE ME THE LECTURE!!!!! U CUD’VE GIVEN ME A EAR!!!!!

DARN U!!!!!!!

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Pump it uP!!!!

November 26, 2009

A power surges through every vein!

re-igniting that lost light..

Seems like the moon is a step away!!

Feel it relieve every cell…

Feel it fill u up with ether!!

so light, u feel like u’d float off into space!!

Dive into the ocean

Feel the water flow!

refreshing every memory.

Look at life play itself out..

like its meant to be..

Like you want it to be!

When ur in ur zone!

the world seems so small

Nothing is outta reach!

Feel the calm!!

take in the moment!!

Feel Him in u!

this is it boys and girls!!!

ITS HERE!! ITS NOW!!

Those moments rarely come… when u feel the Universe, breathe, flow, live and die through u!!!

When U’d hit the bulls eye even if u were blinded and were upside down and rotating at a distance of 200 ft and gravity were acting backwards!!

Like a Wave u rise and u fall!!

and now, i’m definitely feeling lucky!!!

I’m not a gambler!! but i’m taking the biggest bet ever!!!

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The piano!

November 19, 2009

Two piano tributes down and i find myself here.. writing…!

Mind you its two and a half past mid night!!

The usual hassle of the day floats behind me… had internals… funny thing that is…

I knew just so much, that i could make it past the half way mark and then went on to complete the whole thing!

I have the usual crazy session up in my head! End up just saying I don’t knw!!!

I seem to have caught this notion..

Hope is for sissies!!!

So is it!!!?   I’m myself too screwed up to debate this one out! gimme ur thoughts!

We can break down each and every conversation and “human” moment by bringing to surface the real calculations that go into it!

there is this new world view coming up!!

and then there is the college canteen! the mess is the choice! i just can’t make my mind uP!!!

been having stupid trouble with choice! is it the kadai roll or rava idly!

the service n hygiene is brilliant at the this bakery/ cake place but its too hot!!

its the other way around at darshini!

Being stubborn is something i’m born with!

lets see!! i do need to eat! i end up with something neither here nor there!

coming back.. Hope.. Strong word!

But is it a ray of chance that ur wants may be granted or just a illusion created to soothe the failing heart!!

depends on what u’d choose…

the truth or a lie!

like a delusional  man said once !! Everyone lies! Everyone!

This means on one wants to truth voluntarily!!  Ok now dont go and put me down under the cuckoo section yet!!!

I’m still sane just sleepy!

Alright u reader! i am sure i didnt shake u up! so get up! do a few shakes and gimme HOPE!!!!!!!!

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can’t make ur mind up!!?

November 2, 2009

well neither can i!!

question-mark-sign

Is it jus me.. or everyone has troubling making a Choice…

 

 

Decision is different from a choice. I feel a decision is some what easier.

Choice involves u… ur thoughts.. and an irrational idiot called ur heart.. which stupidly over rides ur perfectly right brain!!

 

Darn the thing.. All u need is one moment of weakness to succumb to its will..
Here I stand at the gates of a new dawn.. again faced by a challenge..

the ghastly silence is my comforting support.

 

i cant seem to get my self  to write somethin on this one!!

 

hell….

 

end it here… the damn posts seems to get smaller each time… !!!

 

 

 

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A Circle!

October 22, 2009

Inter-connectivity, Interdependence

blue_moon

Like the Moon changes,

so the tides flow.

AutumnLeaves-1

Like the Sun shines,

so the flower blooms

Like the Rain falls,

so the shoots grow.

rain_grass-copy-739398

Like the Phoenix burns

so it may be reborn again.

phoenix-rising

Like the Mind thinks,

so it may fly free.

Like the World goes round,

so there may be a new dawn.

My_Thoughts_Fly_to_You

Like the life dies,

so it may be born again.

Earth from Moon

Time rolls on and

Like I always will look to u,

so you may guide me again!!!!

reincarnation2

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Into the Nothingness!!! Random thoughts…

October 19, 2009

Somethings are intangible, unfathomable, untouchable, incorruptible…

These things are few and far apart.  It’s very rare people fall in this category.

they do…. hold hard….

Do u feel the presence… do u get to watch stars fall.?

Are we alone here… or is someone out der!!

Hold on… this is gonna hurt…

Lets move it up a notch!

Turbo charge up ur mind…

Are u really here??

Why am i going all backwards…

do when u run at a wall!

a ray of light

blinding

listening to dead ppl!!

make ur mind up abt the living

the strings echo

been flying up der…

Someone get me down..

channel me

lets run the house down

focus… path..

move swiftly

last breath here.

next will be new and tough

nostalgia

going out in flames!!!

don’t worry u fell

get some air n jump again!

it’s all good

castles held high

made it

of to the

sand at the beaches

fall eventually

feel the notes move u inside

feel them strings vibrate

the bass  chug along

u wake up from this dream

only to find…………………………..

Mini Musical Notes.MN027

I heard someone say…

Are you Ex…perienced!!!

may be just not yet…

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